Note to Self...

You're trying to lose weight, remember.

Oh, yeah.

Well, the scale is still doing it's 159-163 yo-yo. Shocking. I swear, I realize I sound like a complete and utter lying loser. "I don't know WHY I can't lose weight!" blah.

I do know why, I just have such a hard time changing things. It's shameful how we become creatures of habit and I cannot tell you how often I find my hand making it's way from a bag of goldfish to my mouth before I even know what is happening. But there are two, no three, new developments:

1.) Alli. I started taking it 2 weeks ago and although the scale is obviously not showing much of a difference (well, it is on the low end of the yo yo for several days now), the complete and utter fear of the treatment effects associated with it are enough to keep me from eating crap. It is not something I plan on taking long-term; I know that my body fights the initial weight-loss more than the shedding of the majority of pounds. I just need something to help get it started, as all of the food journaling and daily walks have as of yet done nothing. Also, when and if I ever get knocked up, I won't be taking a weight-loss supplement, so this is just to maybe help get rid of a few pounds (I only want to lose 15, for cripe's sake!) before I give my body over to embryofetusbaby for two years.

2.) FitTV on Demand. Yay for this little thing and how have I not known about it for the past two years? I could have easily have saved about a grand on personal training and begun my weight loss months and months ago had I known that at any time, I could whip up a 30 minute work out on my TV.

Yesterday, while frantically trying to find an episode of Dora the Explorer for my fevery, teething mess of a child, I discovered a Sport & Fitness button on our OnDemand channel and voila!! Moments later, Ethan was dancing to the thumpa-thumpa music and I was knee-deep in grapevines and shoulder rolls. I had found The Firm. And I can go back and find it any time I want. How cool is that? So I managed to get in a 30 minute work out, in the living room, just like that. Sure, by the end, I was only doing legs because Ethan lost interest in his own grooving and wanted to be held, but still--that's a 20lb weight right there. That's got to be good, right?

3.) New jeans!!! Smaller jeans!! I now have 2 pairs of size 10s that fit me perfectly and do not mush the top of my belly up and over the waist line (aka: muffin top). I am not thrilled that they are 10s, as opposed to the 8s I was wearing before having Ethan, but it is a step in the right direction. I also just bought new yoga pants in a size medium, which I haven't been able to do in 2 years. So all that "it's not the number on the scale, it's the way your clothes fit" stuff is working for me right now.

All in all, even though the infuriating game of yo-yo continues, I'm feeling pretty good. Hopefully within a couple of weeks, the yo'ing will be happening a little farther down the scale.